Flight Jacket Guy

Saw in the news yesterday that the Piano Man, who turned up last April wandering on a British beach, unable or unwilling to identify himself, ended up being no more than a depressed Bavarian youth with little-to-no musical talent.

Meanwhile, here in America, we’ve got our own ongoing mystery, only ours involves Flight Suit Guy. Seems he turned up one day in Washington, saying all sorts of crazy things and now we're finding out none of it was true.

Said he was a "uniter not a divider". Promised to change the moral climate and give the country back its moral fiber. Told us he was going to turn away from the big spending ways of the Democrats. Swore he was going to be a friend to the environment. Made a big point about how he was going to make us all proud to be Americans again.

Well, six years later, turns out he’s actually a divider, not a uniter. He accuses people who have the audacity to oppose his policies of not wanting to win the War on Terror. He deceives the American people on such a grand scale that he’s singlehandedly put an Oval Office blow job into its proper perspective. He’s spent his way to record deficits. He’s ignored what the rest of the world has come to accept as the obvious and calamitous impact of global warming. And he misled the country into fighting a war by exploiting a frightened public traumatized by the terror attacks of 9/11.

And Flight Jacket Guy's still working it. This week he once again made the case that Iraq is the central front on the War on Terror and warned us we’d be “less safe” if we pulled out now.

The Piano Man finally started talking and revealed his identity. Flight Jacket Guy just keeps on deceiving. But seems like the country is finally starting to wake up to who the guy really is.