Friday, December 15, 2006

Last Throes of Employment

I'm not sure what everyone found so funny today at the Armed Forces Full Honor Review in honor of outgoing Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld. I'd kind of like to believe it was when Vice President Dick Cheney referred to Rumsfeld as "the finest secretary of defense this nation has ever had" and that even Rumsfeld himself had to giggle.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Maybe Bill O'Reilly Is Right

Maybe there really is a war on Christmas.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Stay the Course, Which is the New Way Forward

In his weekly radio broadcast today, President Bush thanked the Iraq Study Group for alerting the nation to the "grave situation we face in Iraq" but failed to acknowledge the commission's powerful and often scathing criticism of his war policies. Meanwhile, the White House underscored the president's recent assertion to Bob Woodward that he would not withdraw from Iraq "even if Laura and Barney are the only ones supporting me" by releasing a photo showing not only Laura and Barney but Miss Beazley and Willie the cat at an Iraq War pep rally held in front of the First Family's Christmas tree.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Reflecting Badly

Former Education Secretary and conservative pundit William J. Bennett, commenting on yesterday's release of the Iraq Study Group's findings, wrote that "In all my time in Washington I've never seen such smugness, arrogance, or such insufferable moral superiority." It should be noted, however, that the outspoken public moralist who reportedly lost millions gambling in Vegas and said the beheading of drug dealers would be "morally plausible" does famously live in a house without a single mirror.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Bad News, Kiddies

Santa sailed into Groton, Conn., today aboard the fast-attack submarine USS Albuquerque, signaling to youngsters that unlike in previous years, naughtiness will not only not be tolerated, it may result in a barrage of long-range, subsonic cruise missiles.

Monday, December 04, 2006

Oh, Yeah, And Thank You SO MUCH for All The Food You Put On The Paper Towel For Me

The Associated Press reports that in an effort to convince employees to lead healthier lives, companies like Replacements, Ltd. in Greensboro, N.C., are encouraging employees to bring their dogs to work with them to "encourage mental wellness." Pictured above we see Charmin, a 6-year-old Bichon, contemplating suicide as he waits for his owner to turn around.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

It's Around Here Somewhere

The singing of the National Anthem at the 2006 Kennedy Center Honors tonight gave us a pretty good idea of where everybody's heart was located. Vice President Dick Cheney, of course, did his best to approximate.