According to an AP headline today, "Heidi Klum Enjoys Marriage and Motherhood." Well, I think I speak for everyone when I say thank fucking god.
Now, I'll admit, I was real worried after she broke up with Renault Formula One team boss Flavio Briatore. Dashing race car driver types don't just fall out of the sky. But lucky for her, that's when Grammy-winning singer Seal came along, swept her off her feet and made the German supermodel whole again by marrying her on a beach in Mexico.
By the way, regarding that last paragraph: any resemblance on the part of Heidi Klum to normal human existence is strictly coincidental. I'm willing to bet that with a little makeup and the right representation, even the woman's bowel movements could get their own eight-page spread in Vogue.
Incidentally, what are the odds that the McDonald's hamburger in the picture below ever got even a millimeter closer to Heidi's mouth?